The Caring Techie Newsletter

The Caring Techie Newsletter

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The Caring Techie Newsletter
The Caring Techie Newsletter
Getting People to Listen is a Skill → Here’s Where to Start

Getting People to Listen is a Skill → Here’s Where to Start

A practical guide to understanding why your message isn’t getting through and what to do about it

Irina Stanescu's avatar
Irina Stanescu
May 15, 2025
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The Caring Techie Newsletter
The Caring Techie Newsletter
Getting People to Listen is a Skill → Here’s Where to Start
8
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Me: Talk me through what happened with that proposal you mentioned.
Client: I posted a six-page doc in Slack two days before our team meeting—overview, architecture diagrams, APIs, performance numbers, even edge-cases. I asked everyone to “take a look before Thursday.”
Me: And on Thursday, how many had read it?
Client: One person skimmed the intro. Most hadn’t opened it. So I shared my screen and started walking through it.
Me: What was the room vibe while you were talking?
Client: Honestly? People were multitasking. A couple were on their laptops, one was eating lunch. Eyes weren’t exactly on me.
Me: Where did you start?
Client: I jumped straight into the diagram: API design, system components, all the technical pieces.
Me: So a deep dive, right out of the gate. Did you ever zoom out to explain why this matters now?
Client: Not really. I figured the urgency was obvious. I just kept talking for about fifteen minutes.
Me: And how did folks respond?
Client: A few polite clarifying questions. Then my manager wrapped with: “Thanks, great work, let’s circle back after launch.” That was a month ago. Nobody’s mentioned it since.


This chat with my client is a textbook case of what happens when a good idea gets a lukewarm response.

Too often, good proposals are met with polite nods, vague “let’s revisit later” comments, or silent apathy. Not because people disagree, but because they weren’t really listening in the first place. The first step to getting buy-in is getting people to actually listen.

If people are tuning you out, structure, clarity, and delivery are usually why. This article will help you diagnose what’s going wrong, so you can fix what’s blocking your message from getting through.

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