Show, Don’t Tell: How to Multiply Your Chances of Changing People's Minds
Many years ago, I was tasked with leading the engineering team in charge of the re-architecture of the delivery experience in the Uber Eats Eater App. It was a very bold project, spanning over mobile and a number of critical backend services.
I was excited about the opportunity, but there was a little wrinkle in the plan. In typical Uber fashion, we were given 3 weeks to complete the project.
My first reaction was: “Wow that’s ambitious, I’m not sure we can deliver in such a short amount of time”. But that didn’t seem to concern, nor convince the leadership team.
I wasn’t able to influence my leadership team to change the deadline until I sat down and created a massive spreadsheet breaking down the work and assigning estimates. I used the spreadsheet to show people that 3 weeks wasn’t going to be enough, which helped me negotiate for more time and resources.
The principle that made the difference between the two approaches is: “Show, don’t tell”.
In today’s article we’re tackling:
What is “Show, don’t tell” and how does it work?
🔐 How to apply “Show, don’t tell” in your day-to-day work (paid subscribers)
🔐 “Show, don’t tell” also means “Leading by example” (paid subscribers)
What is “Show, don’t tell” and how does it work?
“Show, don’t tell” is a storytelling technique in which you aim to tell the story through sensory details and actions, rather than exposition.
“Show, don’t tell” is more than an excellent writing technique, it’s also a very effective communication principle that can be used in work contexts to be more persuasive.
The Russian novelist Anton Checkhov explains it best:
“Don’t tell me the moon is shining. Show me the glint of light on broken glass”.
“Show, don’t tell” works for storytelling and persuasion the same way:
it takes the conversation from the abstract realm, into the more tangible one
it helps your audience tune in by engaging their imagination and/or different senses.
It’s all about capturing your audience’s attention.
When you're trying to get buy-in for your ideas, especially in a team setting, showing rather than just telling can be incredibly effective.
How to apply “Show, don’t tell” in your day-to-day work
The principle behind “Show, don’t tell”, is to engage the audience in different ways rather than simply delivering information, allowing them to experience the story through actions, feelings, and senses.
Here’s how you can incorporate the different senses in your communication:
Visual: This is the most direct sense in "Show, don't tell." Use visuals like illustrations, charts, graphs, slides, and prototypes to make abstract concepts concrete. Visual aids help clarify complex information and ensure everyone is seeing the same thing.
Auditory: Through storytelling or presenting data and ideas verbally alongside visuals, you can engage people’s imagination and help them connect emotionally to your ideas. Your voice's tone, pace, and inflection can also convey passion, urgency, or importance about the topic at hand.
Tactile: If applicable, offer a demo, a workshop, or a hands-on session where people can interact physically with a product and experience the benefits of the proposed change directly.
“Show, don’t tell” also means “Leading by example”
"Show, don't tell" isn't just a communication technique, it’s also a crucial strategy for effective leadership. To “show” essentially means “to lead by example”, a very powerful method for influencing organically that bypasses the need for direct orders.
By acting in the way you want others to emulate, you provide a clear, living blueprint for your expectations.
The beauty of leading by example comes from the fact that it builds trust and respect. It’s much easier to issue orders from the top, and much more difficult to actually practice what you preach. When you lead by example, you’re in the trenches with your team.
This kind of leadership shows commitment and integrity, making it easier for others to buy into the vision and work ethic. It’s what makes people want to follow.
That’s all for today. Thank you for reading.
Until next time,
The Caring Techie
It doesn't matter if you're right ... if you can't get others to join you. Your ideas are only good if you can others to help you make them a reality.
“Show, don’t tell” is one of many communication techniques that can help you get buy-in and make you more convincing. To learn more, join the June cohort of “Impact through Influence in Engineering Teams”.
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Love this, Irina and it's a great reminder. From my experience, I have done a mix of both, and it's always more upfront effort to show but when it comes down to being forced to take on a project on an unrealistic timeline vs getting the time you actually need, that additional effort is more than worth it!
Thanks for the great article
Love this. You've explained the concept beautifully. I knew about this as a communication teqnique. Now, I also know how it applies to leadership. Thanks for sharing.