Influential People Don’t Network, They Build Social Capital
Wouldn’t it be nice to always be able to pick up the phone to ask for a job referral when you need one, no questions asked? Or to ask for an intro to someone? Or for support or advice on an idea?
The people we have good relationships with will be more than happy to help us out with any of these things. The reverse is also true, if we barely know someone, it’s unlikely we’ll get positive responses to such asks.
We’ve been told that strong networks are built through networking, but that never really worked for me. If the word networking gives you the ick too, then let me tell you something: there is a better way and that way is through building social capital.
Strong networks are not built through networking.
In today’s article, we discuss:
What social capital is and how to earn, spend, and loan social capital
The network effect of social capital
The relationship between social capital and career security
Meet Social Capital, Your New Social Bank Account
Social capital is like having a bank account for each person in your professional community. With every interaction, you get an opportunity to make a deposit into this account. The deposit amounts might vary over time based on your capacity that day, and that’s okay.
The more meaningful the interaction, the more the deposit is worth. A smile and a polite hello mean little, while providing support or helping people achieve something they want can mean a whole lot more. We’ll talk more about specific ways to build social capital in the next article, so stay tuned!
Just like a regular bank account, you also get to spend what you deposit. Some types of asks—favors especially—require you to pay social capital which is withdrawn from the account. Unintuitively, the cost of an ask depends largely on how much you have already in the account. The same favor will cost much less when the account has a lot of funds.
Focus on what you can do for others, not what others can do for you.
To make this social bank account work, focus on what you can do for others, not what others can do for you. Make habitual social deposits and provide value without waiting for anything in return, so that when you do need something in return, you have plenty to spend.
Don’t Rely on Credit
If your social capital funds are low, you get some credit but limited. Consuming this credit can help you make a little headway, but if you don’t refill these funds, soon enough your card will be denied.
So don’t be one of those people who barely says hi, but when they need something they’re all over you. I’m sure we’ve all experienced this type of person that makes it very obvious that all they care about is themselves. Social capital is caring about others.
With credit, you might get what you want once, maybe twice, but soon enough you’ll create a reputation for being self-interested. A damaged reputation lowers your credit score and your social capital deposits won’t matter as much no matter how hard you try. This damage is really hard to fix in the long run, so I’d avoid it at all costs.
Keeping Tabs Is Wrong
The point of building social capital is not to just build a list of people who owe you favors. If you see building social capital as transactional, you’re doing it wrong. If you analyze whether to do something for someone based on what you could potentially get back, you’re also doing it wrong.
Building social capital takes time, so if you wait until you need it, it’s too late. Also, people can tell if you have a genuine desire to help vs a hidden agenda, so be genuine and the help you give will return to you multiplied.
Influence and The Network Effect
A strong network is a byproduct of building social capital. Besides giving you the ability to ask for favors when you need them, having networks has another big advantage: they make it easier for information to flow and for ideas to spread. "It's not what you know, it's who you know" explains it best.
If you’ve built enough social capital, people will be more open to listening and advocating for you, which in turn will make you more influential. To learn more about influence, read the articles linked below!
Career Security + Social Capital = ❤️
In the age of tech layoffs, job security is no longer what we can realistically aim for. What we should optimize for instead is career security and creating a sense of career continuity despite disruptions.
The social capital you’ve built also helps gain career security. The influence aspect we discussed in the previous section helps you get more done within your current job and makes you more indispensable to your employer. Also, social capital is your safety net in case something unexpected happens with your job. Win-win!
Social capital is your safety net.
Conclusion
Similar to real money, the social capital currency can be earned, spent, and taken on a loan. In the long run, your network becomes your net worth. How much is yours worth?
Until next time,
Your Caring Techie
P.S.: In the next article we talk about specific ways to build social capital in engineering teams!
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To learn more about influence, here are some related articles:
“Networking” does indeed give me the Ick factor, Irina.
But being a genuine, helpful, interesting, outgoing person – both online and offline – has paid off a lot in my life. It’s helped me build relationships to where I really could just call some friends up and tell them I need a new opportunity – and they could do the same with me!
The difference is, we truly care about each other... we aren’t just spamming each others DMs to try to get our latest social media post to go viral.
Building social capital is hard... but it’s worth more than money. 💰
This reminds me very similar to the concept of the 7 Habits book where he mentions about each relationship you have you make deposits and withdrawals to emotional bank accounts with the people around us. Such an important concept for anyone looking to build relationships in the industry, thanks for your insights 🙏